I often hear parents asking a very intriguing question. How can I punish my special child without feeling guilty? In an African setting, they say, spare the rod and spoil the child. In our context, the rod doesn’t necessarily mean the beatings and pinching. If I punish when I see a negative behavior isn’t it fair to motivate/ reinforce the child when I see a positive behavior?
When a child misbehaves in the supermarket for instance, some parents might give the child extra attention or buy toys to stop the behavior. The child learns that when he or she throws a tantrum, they get what I want. By so doing, the parent reinforces the misbehavior.
In operant conditioning, positive and negative don’t mean good and bad. Instead, positive means you’re adding something, and negative means you’re taking away something. Reinforcement means you’re increasing a behavior and punishment means you’re decreasing a behavior.
Positive reinforcement is a type of reinforcement that works by giving someone the desired reward in response to a behavior. One can give praises, give tokens, etc. However, they should be age-appropriate. For example, give a smiley face or star for complete work.
Positive reinforcement is very useful learning tool. There are things you can do to ensure it is effective. Be aware of reinforcement timing. It is effective when it occurs immediately. Waiting to reinforce risks reinforces the wrong behavior.
Negative reinforcement works by taking away unwanted stimuli to encourage good behavior. Children learn that when they engage in “good” behavior then this unpleasant experience goes away. For example, you’re nagging the child to finish food. By removing the unpleasant experience(nagging) the parent reinforces the behavior of finishing food. Timing and consistency are key for effectiveness. Both positive and negative reinforcement aims at increasing the appropriate behavior occurring in the future.
When people think of punishment, they immediately think of spanking, pinching, etc. Punishment is any change that occurs immediately after a behavior. This reduces the likelihood that the behavior will occur again in the future. For example, if the child doesn’t finish food or homework, the parent takes away his favorite toy or tablet. Punishment can be effective if it is applied quickly and consistently.
To sum it up, reinforcement and punishment will be effective when it’s done immediately and consistently.